William's First Year

William’s started to smile! This is him at playtime today, listening to Mozart and watching Mummy pull daft faces 🙂

Had an excellent morning, running around Cannons car park with the girls in the driving rain, pushing our plastic-encarcerated babies around. We must have looked absolutely deranged.

William’s been so well behaved today, it only took me half an hour to get him to sleep at nap time this morning and then he was an angel the entire time we were at Cannons. We played this afternoon and he’s so alert now that he keeps me on my toes – God forbid he should get bored with twirly things! I’m learning to speak ‘Will’ much better now, so when I spot a yawn it’s time for a cuddle followed by bed and some wildly flat singing by Yours Truly and he’s away in baby dreamland.

We had a less than successful attempt at this yesterday afternoon as William decided to scream as soon as we arrived and only early tea could persuade him to shut up. Of course as soon as all the other angels had been massaged, cooed and sung to, he decided to chill out and turn back into the angel I know him to be. Never mind. We had a crack at it quietly this morning and he loved it, so I’ll keep doing it every day while it’s quiet at home and maybe next week we’ll be able to join in.

We also had a good visit from the Hy, the Health Visitor, Will is now 10lbs!! So I’m really happy with his weight gain. We put him in his room for the night yesterday and he slept from 7.30pm (after some protest) to 12.00 and then through to 7am. Amazing. He is a fantastic little boy. I must remember that and learn to relax when things don’t go perfectly – which let’s face it, is pretty rare really.

Had a much better day today (well, it couldn’t really have got any worse), and despite having to take Will out in the Baby Bjorn first thing to get him to sleep, he was very well behaved. Eddie cooked the most incredible fry-up for brunch which helped enormously too.

In the afternoon Lisa and Rob came over to meet William and it was lovely to see them. While Eddie and Rob went off on another, obligatory cricket-bonding session, Lisa and I set off in the driving rain with William to make sure he got fresh air and a nap before tea and bedtime. Two anorak-clad BEAUTIES.

Today I finally cracked. We tried and tried to settle William for his nap this morning, but everytime his head hit the mattress, he woke up and screamed blue murder. Eventually, after 4 goes (2 each) Eddie swooped down on the baby and whisked him off to Tescos in the car – it took all of 10 seconds for him to pass out…

All the tiredness, trauma, anxiety and newness of the past 6 weeks suddenly washed over me in a huge flood. I burst into tears which wouldn’t stop. I cried and cried. Eventually Eddie persuaded me to go and have a lie down, and I did finally manage to sleep for about an hour. Now I know how William feels when he’s overtired and upset.

The rest of the day went relatively peacefully, until the evening, when I couldn’t get William to feed on the right hand side for some reason. He just cried and got into a state. Eventually I tried a new position, tucking him under my arm like a rugby ball so that he didn’t have to lie on the left side of his head. It worked like a charm. I’m not sure what to do now, I’m worried sick now (neurotic mother). Is it time for cranial osteopathy? Has he got a headache or something? He fed on that side earlier, so why this evening has he suddenly decided he doesn’t like lying like that? The health visitor’s coming on Monday so I’ll see what she thinks.

Will now attempt to calm down and enjoy the evening with Eddie and Dave, but it’s hard – I’m completely overwrought and there’s only Curling left to watch on TV, boring as all hell.

One, two three…..ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

He’s gorgeous 🙂

Poor little Will, he spends 3 days coming into this world and is suddenly in a very strange place with weird people making funny noises and faces at him all the time. It can’t be easy.

William is a very good baby, he’s never been a screamer as such, keeping us awake til all hours (although when he does go off God help us all), but it’s the constant worrying that I find absolutely debilitating…:

1. Will he go to sleep?
2. If he sleeps will he not sleep tonight because he’s had too much sleep?
3. If he stays awake will he not sleep tonight because he’s overtired?
4. Once he’s asleep, how long will he sleep and will it be enough for me to do the washing/ironing/expressing/sterilising/log collecting/rubbish sorting/washing-up/cat’s breakfast/cleaning/cooking/dressing/showering/face/make-up/hair (not necessarily in that order)
5. If I wake him up will he scream?
6. If I don’t wake him up will he scream more later?
7. If I’ve done everything I can think of and he’s still screaming what do I do?
8. If Eddie isn’t home in 2 minutes should I go ahead and bath/feed him?
9. If I wait for Eddie will he get into a state and not sleep later?
10. If he’s not screaming, how long can it possibly last before he does scream?

Etc etc….

I’m reliably informed this is a state of mind that will now be with me, in various permutations, forever.

EXHAUSTING.

I love this picture – it’s William looking gleeful just before exploding on Eddie in the bath 🙂

Today I watched Will like a hawk and as soon as he looked sleepy, put him to bed at 8.30am and he slept for an hour. We also went out for a long walk with Nina and Lucy in the village – Yummy Mummies in convoy! So that was another 2 1/2 hours after we’d pootled along and then had cake and tea. Finally got home to find I couldn’t wake the little man up and started panicking that he wouldn’t sleep later. Fortunately though I just ended up with a much calmer baby and a quiet Valentines evening of oysters and champagne with Eddie.

Eddie actually put it very well; napping in the day is one thing, but 6.15pm is Will’s bedtime and will be for years to come. He knows his routine now and always sleeps from 7 – 10.30. I must stop worrying every night that he’s going to wake up in the middle and scream.

Inconsolable is the only word that could describe Will today. The decibel level of his screams reached new heights and I was on the verge of tears and phoning Eddie to ask him to come home. It was horrific. Thank heavens for the lovely NCT girls who kept me going, gave lots of advice and took Jack-Jack away from me when I couldn’t cope anymore.

William finally went down at 5pm after a full day of screaming. I fortunately managed to get his bathtime sorted in time and he’s now fast asleep upstairs while I try to repair my shredded nerve endings and make vaguely intelligible conversation with my husband.

We’re home from a lovely walk around Welford Park through the snowdrop woods with Richard, Sonya and the kids. Admittedly it was raining cats and dogs, and blowing a gale, but the walk was beautiful and most importantly we got to have tea and cake at the end. AND, I went out in my pre-pregnancy jeans which, although admittedly a little tight, made me feel like I’m finally getting back to normal. Will came along in the Baby Bjorn and passed out as soon as the fresh air hit him. He’s been zonked out ever since and is currently ensconced in front of Ski Sunday with Eddie, his eyes tiny slits, very happy.

There’s still no pattern to Will yet, we take the quiet times in the day and treasure them. Yesterday I ran away to Newbury to get some much needed waxing done and generally go on a Will-free trip. When I came back the baby was shrieking in the garden (much as he had been all morning) and poor Eddie was at his wits end. The only way to get some quiet was to keep the buggy moving. William’s a canny little man and as soon as the motion stopped, he started. The only plus was that he wore himself out and slept really well that night.

Not sure what this new, post-snowdrop, sleepy William holds in store for us later on. One thing’s for sure, you can never predict what he’s going to do next.